My absence and a drowned man at Exeter Quay
May 13th, 2008Over three months of not posting! Whatever next?
Don’t worry eager readers (not that I actually have any), I have been diligently collecting my belly button fluff all this time; more on that later though, I want to explain my absence and also today’s events.
Firstly: Where have I been?
Well, as mentioned in the last entry, I was coughing a lot and had a friend dying in hospital. The cough turned into a six-week chest infection and my friend is dead. The cough was mostly clearing up by the time he died, but it was still vicious enough to preclude me from being one of his pall-bearers; the last thing I wanted was to have a coughing fit and drop him on his final journey.
So, Ian Slade is dead. I won’t tell you how great he was or what he did or liked; for those that didn’t know him, it would be meaningless, and those that did know him will not need telling. Needless to say, he will be missed and his death caused me great sadness and distraction.
At around the time all this was happening, my company was bought out by a large London digital agency. I have gone from a large cog in a small machine, to a small cog in a large mechanical lanscape-dominating edifice. This has taken a lot of getting used to and the integration has been challenging at times. On top of this, business is booming and I have more work than ever.
Recently my wife has developed all the classic symptoms of meningitis. The doctors were of the opinion that the symptoms were coming on too slowly for meningitis and sent her home. She didn’t die, which was a massive relief, but I did spend a lot of time worrying.
So that is my life in a nut-shell for the last three months; all except for today that is.
Secondly: Today I watched a man drown.
Some work colleagues and I went to the pub for lunch down on the quay in Exeter; this turned out to be an experience (I would say “mistake” but that would trivialize the lessons learned and their cost). We arrived to find a man having a bit of an argument with the publican; it wasn’t overly heated as such, but there were threats of beatings being casually tossed around by both parties and the man was rather drunk. We sat outside and observed for a while and the publican obviously called the police, as they turned up after a while. They spoke to the man for a while and I went to order food. When I came out of the pub, the man (I wish I could give him a name) was in the river and swimming. Now, before anyone calls police brutality, he dived in of his own accord apparently.
This is where is got ugly. The man stopped swimming fairly quickly and then stopped raising his head for air. People started wondering if he was drowning (he was rather drunk after all) but I think most thought he was faking it to get the coppers to jump in after him (myself included). Then he sank.
People were starting to realise that something was wrong at this point and a few people started to react (myself not included), including one of my work colleagues. There were four members of the public in the water looking for him before one of the watching police officers joined the rescue effort. Unfortunately the water was five yards deep (according to the police divers that turned up later) and visibility was around two-feet in the murky depths of the Exe.
After ten or fifteen minutes, people started to give up; there were professional rescue divers arriving on scene and he was most-likely dead by then anyway.
Then our lunch arrived.
I have spent most of the afternoon dwelling on this: I sat and watched a man drown today.
At first I was paralysed by indecision (is he faking it or is he really in trouble?), then my mind started making excuses: he really is faking and he will come up for air at any moment; the police will rescue him; being fat and unfit makes me a poorer choice for this by far than most other people here; there are already people helping, they will drag him to the surface any moment now; it is too late now, surely?
However, the more time went by, the more I regretted not being the one that said “fuck it” and just jumped in. All afternoon I have been asking myself: would he be alive now if I had acted, if I had not dithered? Those that tried, while they failed to rescue him, can at least say they tried.
For a while I was angry; angry at the drunken fool for going for a swim, angry at myself for not doing anything, angry at the police for just watching. The anger that endures though is the anger at those people that were busy lamenting the fact that no-one was helping him while doing nothing themselves.
I have learned some valuable lessons today. Unfortunately it took a man’s life to teach them.
Update: The BBC have covered the story: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/devon/7399083.stm
May 14th, 2008 at 8:15 am
I too was at the Quay in my lunch break yesterday and saw all of the horrible incident you’ve described. It was scary and awful, but I would urge you not to feel angry with yourself, or guilty for not doing anything.
I stood on the edge of the quay, struggling with myself over whether it was appropriate to do something, and like yourself, did nothing. I kept telling myself that I was not the best person to get involved, am not a particularly strong swimmer or particularly strong physically, the more people in the water the more confusion it could cause etc. And while I think it was extremely brave, heroic and commendable of the men who did chose to jump in and try and help, I dont think that anyone who didnt should feel bad (including the police). While the exact circumstances of the event (for example why the man chose to get in the water in the first place - I have heard people speculate that he was trying to commit suicide, my impression was that he was drunk and made a grave error of judgement when he thought it would be funny to swim in the river) are still not 100% clear to me, it is clear that the man was drunk, causing some minor trouble, and chose to get in the river of his own accord. For anyone to jump in and help him would have meant that they were risking their own lives too. The river is not safe to swim in, and hypothetically if they had reached the man there could have been a struggle. I think people may have reacted differently if the man had fallen in to the river by accident, or if the victim had not been so obviously intoxicated and aggressive.
I completely agree with your last statement though. My anger is directed towards the small-minded people who stood around loudly voicing their opinions on who should have helped, how ‘useless’ the police were etc etc while failing to make any effort to help themselves. I understand why most people there felt it was inappropriate to get in the water, and powerless to help, but I do not understand how they can then shout about how other people failed to assist the man.
May 14th, 2008 at 10:50 pm
I was there too. I was waiting for a boat cruise, had just arrived, got a coffee at the farthest café down the pier and was on my way back to get a bite. I guess the guy (Vic) disappeared from sight just as I noticed some commotion from down the way. I saw the officers on the quay and guessed that some clown had jumped in for a swim with some other pals and the security folks weren’t inclined to go in and drag out a few illegal swimmers. I had no idea that someone had just disappeared from view and was drowning. I am angry at myself for walking away and passing it off as some idiot doing something foolish, even though that was the truth of it. I am truly sad that a life was lost through such carelessness, carelessness on Vic’s behalf. I don’t blame the police for not jumping in right away. Yes, those young fellows were indeed brave and heroic to try and save Vic. They truly put their lives on the line when they made that decision. They (and you) may easily have died in the attempt. The police who stood by knew the danger better than anyone there. I know a bit about what police go through and I am always amazed at the dedication they continue to bring to circumstances where so many people treat them so poorly. I guess what stayed with me more than anything was the sort of “carnival” atmosphere of the whole thing. It was such a beautiful sunny day, people were out enjoying the shops and restaurants, and then everyone seemed to be staring towards the water as if there was a novel “act” in the show. It sure didn’t feel like the tragedy that it was. I’m still trying to process the whole incident. I am very glad to have found your post and the response to it. It has been a big help.
May 15th, 2008 at 12:37 am
Thanks for taking the time to put your thoughts down here Chris and P. They are a lot more sensible and eloquent than most of the comment floating around about this incident.
I am truly amazed at the growing backlash against the police at the scene. The Express & Echo (the local newspaper, for those not from the region) is full of criticism and is giving a fair number of column inches to the rather vocal complaints of two of the “civilian” rescuers.
Some of the comments on the Express & Echo website are absolutely disgusting (http://tinyurl.com/579l5p); by far the worst labels the size of the response from the emergency services as “overkill” and a “waste of tax payers money” (sic). This sort of pointless vitriol isn’t helping anyone.
Ultimately, no-one except the police at the scene knew what police procedure is in this sort of incident, and arm-chair heroes are not best placed to be making judgments on whether they acted appropriately. I suppose this is what the Independent Police Complaints Commission is for, but I am willing to put money on the fact that people will complain if the commission finds that the officers on the scene acted appropriately.
It must be said, I am feeling a lot less guilty today, but I can’t help but entertain a slow trickle of “what if” scenarios. Mostly it is pointless to dwell on this sort of thing; a more useful line of thought is “If I were in a similar situation tomorrow, what would I do differently?”; learn from the events and resolve to act differently if it happens again.
As my work colleague who dived into help said: “Woe-betide the next person that goes for a swim when I am around; they are getting rescued whether they are in trouble or not”.
May 16th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Did you see this article?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/devon/7404863.stm
I didn’t realize that Vic went in swimming AFTER others were already swimming?
Is that what happened?
May 17th, 2008 at 5:22 pm
hi Im dee, I would fist like to introduce myself I’m Vic’s Neice, I would like to thank those who tried to help and to say to those who was battling with two minds, dont feel guilty it was one of those things that affect us all and to be honest we have all had our what if’s ‘ but’s and why’s . What has happened is a tragedy to his family’ friends and loved one’s but my heartfelt sorrow trully goes out to his girlfriend’ who had to standby and watch the horror of it all . to me he’s my uncle vic but to his partner he was much more. i would like to thak all who has put their accounts available for me to see because it makes things a little clearer to understand what happened to vic x
May 17th, 2008 at 6:27 pm
I came across your website whilst searching for information about my Uncle Vic’c death. Please don’t feel bad about not jumping in to help him that day.
There are all sorts of people in this world, some are the type of people who make wrong choices and some are the type of people who become heroes because of the wrong choices other people make. Vic had made a few wrong choices in his life which is probably why he was (apparently) homeless and living miles away from his hometown and family. The choices he made that day he has certainly paid dearly for but if it helps I can honestly say that if I had been there on the quay side I could not have jumped in to help him, I’m not a strong swimmer.
Vic lived a somewhat bohemian lifestyle, liked a good time and a drink. To people who observed his behaviour that day I’m sure he must have looked like just another idiot, which he certainly could be. But I remember him as the Uncle who lived next door to me for the first sixteen or so years of my life, he was close enough to my own age to be more like a cousin. He loved animals, I remember him caring for an injured wild bird until it was well enough to fly again. He was creative, had a good sense of humour, and loved music. He lived his life the way he wanted to and he certainly was never destined to die peacefully in his sleep.
I’m sure I can speak on behalf of all the family when I say I’m grateful to those people who risked their own lives to save Vic but I’m also thankful that no one else lost their lives that day as that would have been truly tragic.
May 20th, 2008 at 11:42 am
Thanks for your comments Anita and Dee.
The people who think of him as “just another idiot” simply display either, a lack of understanding of human society, or a lack of concern about the feelings of others.
The death of a man will always have echoes; be it a girlfriend, a niece or a drinking buddy. There is always someone who will be affected by someone’s death. It is very rare indeed when someone dies and the world doesn’t notice.
Everyone makes bad decisions or choices during their lives. Some lead to worse situations than others, but people’s decisions are their own to make and that needs respecting. Everyone deserves being remembered (preferably for the good-times had with them) though.
If he was living the life he wanted, as you say Anita, then he was probably a lot happier than most.
May 20th, 2008 at 11:45 am
In response to Chris: There were others in the water earlier. I think they were out by the time Vic went in, and I don’t know if they were swimming or doing something else (canoeing for example).
The press has reported that they were swimming, but I cannot confirm or refute that from my own observations.